We’ve got a really quick one today, but it’s a common enough question that I think it deserves a real answer. What happens when you turn off the booty faucet (oh there’s a faucet, people) and he comes sniffing around a little while later?
I’m sure none of this has ever happened to, you know, YOU, right?
Let’s get Tam’s specific situation, and manslate this once and for all, shall we?
Hi Jeff. I think your web site is great. I have a question. A guy I was seeing started treating me like a “booty call”, so I dumped him. I told him that I thought he was a fun guy and that I didn’t regret the time we had spent together, but I think that we needed to do the right thing and move on.
Good for you. I mean, nothing wrong with a booty call if everybody’s on board. But hey, if that’s not what you want, great of you to be 100% straight with him about the thing. Makes it easy on everybody, methinks.
I didn’t hear from him for a while. About a month or so ago, he started leaving these short little messages through my I.M. service. Nothing serious, things like, “I see you are up, you need to get to bed” and “get some rest”. Things like that. He has called once or twice, but it was about business advice. What gives?
Dear Tam,
Ok, this one happens quite a bit. And if I had to make a quick guess, I’d say that your booty call pal is testing the waters for some more booty. That’s just a guess.
Obviously, he didn’t fight too hard on the “no more booty calls” verdict at the time, so he clearly had no major argument with your diagnosis of the situation. You thought it had been a bootylationship, and so it was.
DOG: SO…DO YOU REALLY NOT WANT ME ON THE COUCH?
When you’re training a dog on the finer points of how to live in your home, he will likely not learn things on the first try. When I was a kid, our dog was not allowed to be on the couch. And he’d get a very stern reminder of that fact if he got ON the couch. So he stopped immediately, right?
Er…no. Why? Well, he liked the couch. Who didn’t? It was a sectional, comfy as all get out, who doesn’t want to snuggle in on that bad boy. So every once in a while, he’d sort of sniff around, and sidle his way over to the couch, and then — really casually (in his little mind, anyway) — he’d sort of slink his way up onto the couch.
And then he’d get reminded once again, that no, the couch was for two-leggers only. Eventually he learned. Men do too.
THE LESSON HERE? HE DIGS YOUR COUCH.
That’s it, Tam. He was rather enjoying the booty he was getting. You obviously didn’t HATE him, and so he was sniffing around to see if your stand against the booty was as firm as it had been when you dumped him.
Good luck, Tam. And don’t get caught thinking, “Hm. Maybe he really likes me now.” If he does, he’ll show you that. Right now, all he’s showing you is a pronounced liking of your couch. So to speak.
Ever get the “check in” ladies? What’s your take on it?
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